Today I have not been feeling well. Exhausted, lethargic, dizzy, just overall in a blah type of mood.
I am now 30 years old and can honestly say it never got old leaning on my mom to make me feel better. Even if I was just having a bad day, she'd listen to me go on and on venting and knew how to make me feel better. She was always one of my biggest cheerleaders and encouraged me any way she could even up to her last days.
Today after work, I had the biggest urge to pick up the phone to call her. Not thinking, I picked up my phone with a split second sense of relief that I was going to be able to feel better speaking with my mom and that split second diminished so quickly when I was like "oh wait..." Going on the 3rd month now, not feeling well today and not having her there to lean on is taking a toll on me again. I have been having my come and go moments just thinking about her, ever since that awful day of September 26th. I find myself just tearing up, sometimes all out crying, just thinking about her.
When will this get easier?
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